Amor desperada

I met this guy in January and slept with him the first night I met him. For a month we went out together. I went to eat with his parents and everyone was like, "y'all don't go out yet?" Then I went a week without speaking to him and his best friend and him had a physical fight and he joined the Navy. I spilt everything I felt for him to him and we really haven't spoken much at all.

Before him, in December, I was talking with a guy and he got interested in this other girl, so again I did the same thing and I got the same reaction.

I met this guy Saturday night at a party and I really want to make this work, because out of the 3, he is the easiest to be with, the best to talk to and honestly the best looking as well. Well, today is Thursday and he called me last night. I got so excited. I don't want to sound eager or desperate nor do I want to seem that way around him.

I work the night shift as a Hooters hostess and he said when I got off to call him. I plan on it but what should I say? How do I not come off as eager or desperate for love? How do I control myself from calling him, texting him and sending him messages and comments on MySpace?

Squelching desperation

Dear Desperation,

With all of the attention you're getting, I'm reluctant to say you're desperate at all. But before you call that guy, take a deep breath. You want this to work out, so you can't go whole hog and start pouring out your feelings for him. I suspect you overdid it the first two times.

Keep yourself in check. Just talk about your days and make a date or time to hang out. You're still getting to know each other, so stay away from the movies. You need time to talk.

As for contacting him, if you contacted him as often as I think you might, he's going to think of you as a stalker. For now, restrain yourself to one message a day that you initiate. So leave him one thing on MySpace, or text him once or call him once.

The one thing to remember is to remain calm and let things develop. If it's right, they will.

Aunt Amy